lack of heart

i’ve been so depressed for the last month. I can’t get my mind out of this whirl-wind of self loathing. Specifically money, it has managed to turn me inside out. The problem is I AM NOT HAPPY, go figure?!! hurrm moving right along…so in all this, I have become so imersed in this horrible feeling of hopelessness. But now I know that it just took some love for myself. To take each day…even to each moment. I just have to learn how to take away all the crap to get through school and become happier BECAUSE Charlie and I will not have to worry if our home is taken away from us, again, BEcauSE of money. I realize that money is not going to make me happy. It is much more than that. I already have plans to begin school in the fall and grow myself us an artist. I am truely happy when I create and express my self perfectly. depression is just ME not loving ME, I need to take care of my heart and soul; I am feeding myself kindness. THe beat goes on, and I just started marching. I am in this life to live not take it for granted, my motors are fired!

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